BISCUIT WARS! The White or Wheat Experiment

So this is most certainly not an example of the healthiest meal - though there are some alternatives that make them sliiiightly better for you...not as bad for you. Today is a special day. My big brother bought his first truck. A big ass redneck Ford Bronco that is as awesome as this meal was. In honor of the big ass redneck Ford Bronco and Bert, we're having a good ol' southern breakfast with sausage gravy, cheese grits, poached eggs and biscuits! For my own education, and now yours, I made two different types of biscuit: whole wheat and AP white. Here we go...

A lot of sausage, a pound or more, I didn't even look.

The needs:

Mixing Bowl and round cake pan

Measuring cups and spoons

2 cups flour

1 tbsp. baking powder

1 1/4 tsp. salt (if using unsalted butter)

1 tbsp. sugar (not for sweetness - makes them fluffy)

1 stick of butter

1 cup milk

This is a precious thing to me, the biscuit. I've seen it butchered time after time. I can tell you that this same recipe (my recipe) is made in a local hotel. It isn't my hand making them but I know for a fact there is at least one person that makes them beautifully - Kristina, you're a bad ass. Anyway, pay attention to these instructions and you will have delectable fluffy biscuits in 12-14 minutes (after preparation). Remember...dear, dear precious biscuit...

Sift together (or you can whisk) all the dry ingredients.

For this experiment I'm using one recipe with wheat flour and one with white. Each of the vintage "Granddaddy" pans have one tablespoon of butter each to be melted.

These pans have had thousands of biscuits in them. My grandfather made biscuits in these for decades and when he got new ones, I got these. They're perfect.

(to learn more about how this is done, reference the gravy tricks)

Breakfast gravy should start with meat. That's what I think. Peppered gravy is a fine alternative for vegetarians, but sausage gravy is the best! I browned all of the sausage and there wasn't much fat left, just all of this good stuff stuck to the pan. Another argument for healthier cooking is that stainless is better for your health and the flavor of the food. For this, it is essential. I increased the breakfast gravy ratio by a little. Because I wanted more gravy. Who doesn't? Then I added the sausage back...(I do understand that gravy is not healthy, we're making it healthier)

...back to the biscuits...focus...

**Very important** the butter should be FROZEN!! From the moment the butter comes out of the freezer, your movement should be fluid and purposeful. Cut the butter into cubes and (preferably in a food processor, but fingers can do it too [insert joke here]) add to 1/2 cup of flour mixture (or everything if you have a big boy food processor). Pulse 3-5 times until is looks like thiiiiiis...

The average size we're going for is a pea, but bigger pieces aren't bad.

With a well in the middle, add the milk and then fold the flour/butter into the milk and back around over and over until just mixed!! The tenderness of this biscuit depends on your easy hand!

(This is the wheat version) Throw this onto a large flour'd surface and flour your hands.

I like big biscuits so I smooshed this down with my fingers until it was a uniform thickness, whatever that is. I don't have a rolling pin, if you use a rolling pin do it very lightly, keeping air in the dough.

[White flour dough pictured] Using a wine glass/biscuit cutter/cookie cutter/circular car part, cut out biscuits and place into buttered pan.

*When using wheat flour, the dough will take 1/8 - 1/4 cup more milk than the recipe calls for. The white flour will make a very soft dough that will make soft, light biscuits that should be handled with care when moving to the pan. I am a loser, do you see how I'm talking about biscuits? I can't even babysit children, but I can care about biscuits. I digress...let's check the gravy out.

You can add milk if needed, the sausage took up a lot...it was more like sausage with gravy than gravy with sausage. Nothing wrong with that...once a year.

After brushing on some egg wash (one egg and a dash of water, scrambled), bake at 450 degrees for 12 - 14 minutes, or until golden brown. You might be tempted to take them out because they will look too delicious to let the oven have them in its company anymore, but let them get brown and beautiful and it will be all the more delicious.

The wheat didn't rise as much and were more dense, but tasty in a "healthier biscuit" kinda way. The white was...it...well, not to brag but I am damn proud of this recipe and they tasted delicious. I have made this recipe with a mixture of both flours and the wheat makes it dense and heavy no matter what, but you can feel better about eating a biscuit that isn't thaaat bad.

Some cheese grits, eggs and honey were the final touches.

I don't eat like this everyday, and neither should you, but it tastes sooo good! As far as the war goes, the white tastes better [insert another joke here], but wheat is unarguably healthier. I say, "You're eating a biscuit!!" It shouldn't be heavy, chewy, dense, crumbly, floppy or ever have grape jelly on it! It should be perfect and perfect biscuits are light and fluffy and buttery and delicious and never have grape jelly on them! I didn't add any more butter to these biscuits after baking, I poached the eggs in boiling water and used honey instead of any kind of jelly which drops the calorie count a little. And makes me feel a little better about stuffing my face with delicious southern food.

I hope you try these recipes out so you too can have delicious biscuits...

in and around your mouth!!

**COMMENT!**